Graphic by Edleen Guiao.
Q: What would you do to stop singular people from taking group study rooms when there's already individual study rooms?
A: Ever since the library removed its room reservation policy, the options for handling this are limited. You could politely ask the person if they could use one of the individual study rooms. Or you could assert your superior numbers and take the space by force. TNL does not condone violence.
Q: What item do you hope will be obsolete in 20 years?
A: Taxation.
Q: My boyfriend cheated on me. What's the best way to get revenge?
A: Leave him and live a good life. The best revenge is to not seek revenge. They will forever regret their decision, and you will move on with your life.
Q: In the context of string theory and the holographic principle, how could the entanglement of quantum states within a multi-dimensional framework provide insights into the emergence of spacetime and gravity? And what might this imply for the reconciliation of thermodynamic laws with the fundamental nature of information in black hole thermodynamics, particularly regarding the implications for causality and the potential existence of parallel universes?
A: Yes.
Q: Are hotdogs sandwiches?
A: Hotdogs are tacos.
Q: I have fallen asleep with my head resting on a plate of ice cream. What do I do now that I'm awake?
A: Wash your face and hair, carry on with the day. Maybe buy some ice cream to make yourself feel better.
Q: Best meal to make when drunk — preferably without burning down my house?
A: Microwave a plate of Totino’s Pizza Rolls; it’s relatively safe. The only burning danger is the danger to your tongue and mouth.
Q: What is your Subway order?
A: Italian herbs and cheese, salami, pepperoni, pepper jack, toasted, spinach, onion, sweet onion sauce, creamy sriracha, mayo.
Q: Where can I find seats when the lower-half of the dining hall is blocked off because of ANSEP? I just wanna eat :(
A: This is an issue that has bothered me for quite some time, and I don’t really have an answer. I wish the university would put the ANSEP students in one of the conference rooms that are there. The walls can be opened and it’s basically an extension of the cafeteria. So why take the space away from UAA students when there is an easier solution present?
Q: If you could un-invent something, what would it be and why?
A: The lightbulb. I think it would be hilarious for all of us to have laptops and cars, but still have to get around by candlelight.
Q: What's the worst drink someone can order at a bar?
A: A diet coke.
Q: Would you rather be 12 inches tall or 12 feet tall?
A: 12 inches. How cool would it be to ride around on a Dachshund or an RC car?
Q: Am I the asshole for always having my high beams on even when it's 1 p.m.?
A: Probably, but it is your life, and you get to live it your way.
Q: Do you have any advice on not getting hunted down by the U.S. government? I particularly fear the possibility of getting murdered by the CIA.
A: Don’t work for Boeing.
Q: What is a movie that other people would argue is garbage but you would defend tooth and nail?
A: There are so many. “The Boondock Saints” comes to mind, objectively it could be considered bad, but I love it, and it has become a cult-classic over the years since its release.
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