Graphic by Edleen Guiao.
Q: Do you ever worry about the digital footprint you’ll be leaving behind after you graduate and/or leave the paper? Everything’s out there in perpetuity…
A: Not even a little bit. I have already gone out and done real life. I am doing college purely because I thought it would be fun. This is my life and I live it completely free of judgement from others. In addition, nothing I have done here at the paper is going to leave any kind of blemish on my record.
Q: What color should we change the light to then…?
A: This question is in response to a previous comment that someone had made about the lighting in the Esports Lounge: Personally, I love the lighting. I do not think that y’all should change it.
Q: What are you even supposed to do for spring break in Alaska?
A: There is a lot to do! Skiing and snowboarding are great ways to get outside and have some fun, but there is plenty to do even if you’re not big into winter sports. Personally, I will be treating Anchorage like my own personal Cancun. It’ll be floral pattern shirts and Mai Tai’s for a whole week. Spring break around Alaska can be nice because some of the tourist trap destinations might be opening up, but the tourists won’t be flooding in yet. Go explore, find things to do that you wouldn’t normally consider doing. Create an adventure for yourself!
Q: Are you gonna be single over spring break?
A: Considering that I have been single for the last several spring breaks, I would say that it is safe to assume there will be no change within the next week or so. Unless someone gets bold and approaches me.
Q: How do you look in a sundress?
A: I bet I’d look cute in a sundress.
Q: I bet you'd look cute in a sundress.
A: Hey what do you know, I was right.
Q: What are you doing for spring break?
A: I had planned on going to Mexico, but I have decided to stay in Anchorage. I will be acting like I am on a beach every single day — I will have zero regard for the snow or the cold weather. It is short sleeves and shorts all week long. Might even have to go swimming.
Q: My boyfriend’s penis is absolutely huge, but it hurts when we have sex. Am I not the right person for him? (We tried both holes btw).
A: Quite the predicament. A healthy sex life is important to a relationship, so if either one of you is feeling unfulfilled — or in this case, hurt — seeking a solution, support or clinical help can be beneficial for everyone involved. I am not the person who can pass judgement on whether or not y’all are compatible, but what I can say is that you have options. You can both play with sex toys by using them in foreplay and whatnot. Most importantly, make sure that you are relaxed and comfortable. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to perform and pleasure him immediately. Talk through it with him and make sure he knows this is something you need to pace yourself with. If all else fails, UAA’s Student Health and Counseling center may be able to help through counseling or physical exams.
Q: In the last edition you mentioned the couches outside of the den, THOSE USED TO BE IN THE DEN AND THEY TOOK THEM OUT! Can you (or someone else) investigate why they took the couches out of the den and stopped turning on the fire? I used to love hanging out in the den but now it’s just depressing and cold.
A: We will look into this, but I am sure you could just ask someone to turn the fire back on or move the couches.
Q: Will the paper be covering the federal funding cuts/UAA impacts more? I’d appreciate more news and opinion on this since it strongly impacts all of us.
A: Yes. We will have someone cover this in the near future and we are currently in the works of an investigative series regarding new campus assessments directed by the Board of Regents.
Q: What are Tanner’s break plans?
A: Margaritas, Mai Tai’s, Piña Coladas, Sex on the Beaches, Long Island iced teas, some White Claws, some Twisted Tea, a Dark and Stormy, mojitos, mimosas, maybe an Old Fashioned, a bottle of Scotch and to top it all off, an ice cold can of PBR.
Q: Why are business and economics majors all crypto-fascists?
A: An intriguing question, although, I will give any and all business and economics majors the opportunity for a rebuttal.
Q: Tanner, yaoi or yuri? or secret third option — yume.
A: Yume just means “dream” in japanese, so I’ll take yume, but if you mean yumejoshi, yumedanshi or yumejin, I might have to change my answer.
Q: Thoughts on DEI (wrong answers only)?
A: Honestly, I am not sure how to answer this. Are you wanting me to be satirical? What does wrong answers only mean?
Q: What are some of your favorite books that you are currently reading or that you would recommend?
A: I highly highly recommend both Billy Summers and 11/22/63 by Stephen King. Altered Carbon by Richard K. Morgan is another great book. Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir is an amazing Sci-Fi. As for what I am reading right now, I have been reading The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon by Stephen King.
Q: My girlfriend is using the condom included with newspaper as a balloon. Just figured it would be something funny to include in the next article.
A: That is hilarious. We were actually considering doing a poll to find out how many students actually found the condoms useful. We are glad she found a use for it.
Q: Why can't students access buildings on campus after 11p.m.? I just want a place to study late at night that isn't my room.
A: I completely agree. I wish we had 24 hour access to the facilities, but I also understand there might be some safety concerns around that.
Q: Who is the greatest rapper of all time in your opinion. Not YOUR FAVORITE, but a more objective stance.
A: This is an impossible question to answer objectively considering that art is entirely subjective. I think the greatest of all time boils down to how much their words impact certain individuals. Some people might relate to one artist’s words where another person could never relate to them. In short, there is no single greatest rapper, only a thousand great rappers who all mean something to a bunch of different people.
Q: Why does ANSEP have the right to take over half of the cafeteria?
A: I have recently been hearing a lot of complaints from students about ANSEP. They invest money to maintain their presence on campus, and because of that, they are entitled to share some of our spaces. However, TNL will look into some of these complaints in the future.
Q: Is there a camping club or hiking. I love to do that stuff but no one ever comes with me.
A: I will have to get back to you about the clubs, but I have heard that there is a backpacking or hiking class that you can take. I have heard that they go camping and stuff. Camping and hiking is a huge part of why I moved to Alaska, but I encountered the same issue when I first moved here. I decided to just start going alone, but I will be looking into the clubs and will make sure there is an update in the next Croft’s Comments — if you remind me.
Q: Help! I've burned through three starters and for some reason my Miata still won't start. How do I fix it?
A: First things first, LS swap the Miata. All jokes aside, it sounds like there is either a bad ignition switch or poor wiring in general. Time to break out the wiring diagram and spend hours pulling out both your hair and the wires to check them.
Q: If I ingest sunscreen, will it have the same effect as applying it to my skin? I don't like the way it feels when I put it on.
A: Do not ingest sunscreen. Deal with the feeling, try different ones or don’t wear it, but I cannot imagine that it is healthy for your insides if you ingest it.
Q: I'm struggling to focus on my work or school and can only seem to focus when I'm right at a deadline. How can I stop being severely locked out?
A: I struggle with the same thing. I have started giving myself my own deadlines. I have found that if I convince myself that I need to have an assignment done a week before it is due, I will generally at least get started on the assignment.
Q: I broke my ankle over half a year ago, watched it get all bruised up, and never got it checked out. It seems to have healed on its own, should I be concerned for my long term health?
A: Going to the doctor is probably not a bad idea. Even if it has healed on its own, the lasting effects from a broken bone could cause issues in the future.
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